When you are authentically yourself

We are born with a set of likes and dislikes. What food we like and how much we like being coddled and cuddled. Even as infants we have a preference for certain colors and sounds. However very early on we start to be bombarded with what we “should” do and “the correct” way to live and behave. In our infancy this messaging comes mostly from inner circle (parents, siblings, close family). Our parents or guardians often raise us with their personal ideologies which can often times be flawed (humans are imperfect). Then we start school and in an effort to fit in, we start to adopt certain traits and habits. It gets even more intense as we move through high school and into early adulthood. At that point we receive messages almost every minute from social media, peers, friends, clothing brands, makeup brands, music etc… At every turn we are encouraged to “work hard, play hard/ YOLO”. If you aren’t making mega money to buy all the things that symbolize status and joy then you are missing out.

The thought of who I am authentically has been really prevalent over the last few months. I’ve been learning that not tapping into who are are authentically is the reason why some many people burn out or feel as though they are failing. We are for the most part a follow the crowd society. This realization has prompted me to constantly ask myself: “Do I like this? Does this serve me? Do I feel like I am connected with my higher purpose when I do this?” and the amount of times I have answered no to these questions daily is almost scary. What’s even scarier is that whenever I “thought” this was something I liked it was based on the the fact that I “should” like these things. I’ve come to learn that it is the belief in these narratives that sets people up for burnout and failure. I use the term failure here not in the sense of trying something and not succeeding. I mean failure in the sense of becoming a lawyer because that is what everyone wanted you to be and you are always miserable. Living a life of misery, that is failure. Doing something because it will make others happy when you don’t want to is failure. Not speaking your truth is failure. Trying something and not succeeding is life. The word failure to me is only applicable to living a life where someone wasn’t true to themselves.

We all have our strengths and weaknesses and the ability to do whatever it is we set our minds to. It’s good to be different and it’s good to be yourself. It might be that the people you see doing what you want to do/achieve don’t look like or act like you and that’s ok! There is a first time for everything. If no one like you has ever done what it is you want to do, then that means you get to be the first.

Find your passions try lots of new and different things and make note of what resonates with you deep inside. Dare to dream big, work hard, and put in the time it takes and I guarantee that there is nothing you can’t do. Once you know who you are authentically and what you want to achieve, nothing can hold you back.

Until next time,

T.